Have you ever noticed how it always seems like it’s the rednecks and hicks that come forward with stories of abduction and anal probing? Maybe cows are really the actual targets and they just threw some hicks in the ship to because they were handy. Or, maybe they just got drunk on moonshine, saw some fireworks or stars and imagined they were ships coming to abduct them. Although I guess that still doesn’t explain the probings….
Also, before any hicks write in to complain that we’re being insensitive (hah, as if hicks can use the internet), you should know that I grew up in Iowa nestled between a sheep farm and a soybean field. Which kind of makes me a hick too, and so I’m allowed to make fun of other hicks. Boom, joke loophole!
Also also, Larry the Cable guy either looks A) very excited about his imminent probing, or 2) very satisfied with his recent probing. Either way, he’s not funny and I don’t know why he’s famous.
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