Oh Dawson, why are you always crying? There there, it’s just a little milk. We have plenty more in the refrigerator. Oh, I forgot to go to the store… well I can get some more for you. Hush now, things will be all right. We have some orange juice. Shhh, slow down, I can’t understand you. You’re blubbering like a little girl. What? You’re not upset about the milk? Then why the hell are you being such a little bitch.
Ohhh, you just watched that Sarah Mclachlan commercial with a bunch of sad puppies and sad music. I completely understand. You’re still kind of a pansy though.
As always, if you have a mediocre fight you’d like to see contact us any way your little heart desires. Leave a comment here, tweet us @MediocreFight, find us on Facebook, shoot us an e-mail at The Mediocre Fight, or spell it out in my bowl of alphabet soup. Mmmm, soup.